Monday, May 10, 2010

Preparation: Count-down 3 weeks!!!!

Well, as promised, I am preparing for a trip to Haiti. And here is how that is going... 3 weeks left!!!

Departure Date: May 31, 2010.

Packing Hazards:
    1. Packing ones own toilet paper: how does one estime a months worth of toilet paper?
    2. Blow-up mattress: Do I try it out first and know I will never get it back into its nice small size?
    3. Packing. Period.

Things I still need: a wind-up lamp, snacks to remind me of home, sunscreen of the highest order and  hygeine in a bottle.

    1. I have been getting emails from others in the group and I am thrilled! There are people from the USA, Canada, Scotland, England, Australia, Germany. I absolutely love meeting new people and working hard alongside them!
    2. I've gotten all my shots and medications. Happily the doctor said I can expect to get dead sick from the food at least once. OO-RAH!
Biggest Fear: It hitting home that I cannot fix everything.

Biggest Excitement: Living with the bare minimum.

Needs: Prayer, focus, Mt Dew.

I will keep you updated. My pastors wife suggested I leave everything down there that I bring, which I thought was GENIUS! So I am doing just that.... Counting down!!!!

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Who said a 24 year old should be so obssessed with the future???

"For after all, the best thing one can do when it is raining is let it rain."  — Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

"He who is not contented with what he has, would not be contented with what he would like to have."

— Socrates

I am sitting at home, after a wonderfully fulfilling night with my parents and sister (spaghetti and euchre... what in the world could be better???!!), and I feel content for the first time in so long. And it made me think...

Why do we (or maybe just I) spend so much time planning for the future, looking forward to the next great thing in our life, wishing for those "good old days"? Why do I struggle to be content with today? To LOVE today? To live IN today, and not just live THROUGH it? I am at a complete loss as to how one goes about a lifestyle, living for the day, each one as a wonderful amazing piece of life?? I seem to always be looking at the next thing in my lafe and saying once again... "I'm finally going to be doing something I love"... like with medical school, or going to Haiti? But what if, while I am doing those things, all I do is work through mundane days, looking forward to the next "good day". The elusive "great day".

I have had great days, but I haven't allowed myself to live each day in love with my life and my God. I'm so worried about the future... Is that my personality, this culture, my parents, expectations? I am DYING to get out of this mundane, "get by", live for tomorrow attitude that seems to be seared into my brain.

HOW??? any ideas???

Not that I am not looking forward to going to Haiti, but I just don't want to look back on this time (more down time... good for over-analyzing ones actions and attitudes and selfishness) and wish I had appreciated it instead rather than wishing for the next thing in my life to happen.

I need some good life lessons from someone who lives and enjoys the day for what it is... a great life, full of whatever could be asked for. Know of anyone???

On a side note, I'm not convinced that in a cat and dog fight, the cat would lose... seems to me all the dogs I know share a common fear of cats and their weird noises... Good night.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Character traits in the garden...

I spent the afternoon gardening with my grandmother. I'm not sure there is anything more satisfying than being with grandparents and working hard. You should try it. I have discovered I am terrible at avoiding thorns, no matter how hard I try. I simply forget that there are painful things around. Good or bad character trait??? My mom would love to turn that one into a spiritual lesson... always been a strength of hers.

Also, I have discovered that I LOVE getting packages. It doesn't matter that I am the one who order them, I still find myself thrilled to be getting a package. I immediately take it inside and open it.

My packages are arriving because I have been ordering thigs I will need for Haiti. I got a rather high blow-up mattress because it will be rainy while I am there and apparently tents don't keep flooding at bay. I ordered a good quality sleeping bag, which to my chagrin turns out to be a king sized sleeping bag. Did anyone else know sleeping bags had sizes??? I assumed it was a one size fits all deal. Crap. I guess I will just have to adopt a baby jaguar while I am there and let it keep me warm and protected at night.

Plans are coming along. Friends and family have been helping me financially, and I find I am amazed at the generosity and support of them all. I shouldn't be, but I am. I feel honored and loved, and am once again glad to be holding tightly onto the thread.

I must go shower, for I cannot be late to hot-dogs-over-the-Cleghorn-fire night! Later days...

Thursday, April 22, 2010

The beginning of a glorious adventure

I recently read a book by George MacDonald called "The Princess and the Goblin". Perhaps it is meat to be a children's story, but a certain aspect of the story struck me. The grandmother instructs the young princess to "follow the thread in her hand" if she ever becomes lost or afraid or simply wishes to find her grandmother. At one point in the story the princess is attacked by the goblins and takes out the thread to  follow it... But to her dismay, it does not proceed directly to her grandmother but winds and twists through the dark woods and eventually into dark tunnels and caverns beneath the mountain. Out of trust in her grandmothers love and direction, the princess faithfully follows the thread. The thread leads her to a pile of rock that she must dig through to continue, and finds a young boy trapped and imprisoned by the goblins! Back to the thread she goes, with the boy, out of the tunnels, and back to her loving grandmother.

I was amazed by the young princess and her trust in her loving grandmother. She followed the thread through all things, even when it made no logical sense. I was reminded of my lack of faith in so many areas of my life. How rarely do I do things that don't make sense? Pretty much never. I toil over my decisions, wanting them to make sense and be logical and be "right". How rarely do I trust in my loving Father. And by such lack of faith, am I missing out on critical adventures and directions He has for me?

As per my title, this is the beginning of my thread. Learning how to follow the thread of my loving Father faithfully. It is beginning with an adventure to Haiti. I know, you're jealous! I am THRILLED to be able to go help as much as I am able. I will post later on what I will be doing and how preparations are coming. For now, know that I am physically and mentally sane (boy did I fool that doctor), and will be gone from May 31 to July 1. I will be writing as I have time here, even in Haiti... so keep up! Aubrey Nicole out.....